


Life's good

by Sandra_Taylor



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, mentioned alcoholism, recovering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 22:48:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5223920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandra_Taylor/pseuds/Sandra_Taylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky's recovery was a procces. Tony helped.</p><p>Following movies up to Winter Soldier.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Life's good

Bucky’s recovery was a slow process. When Steve first brought him to the tower, he locked himself in one of Steve’s rooms and didn’t want to see anybody. The only reason why he came out the first time after almost two weeks in said room was his arm which stopped working.

The only one not surprised that him and Tony hit it off almost immediately was Steve. When asked about it he grinned and said something about Tony being just Bucky’s kind of fella.

After the first time Tony repaired his arm while Bucky was staring around the lab in wonder the ex-soldier started to spend more time out of Steve’s floor. Most of that time he spent in the lab. All of it with Tony. Mostly they had some food together after tinkering around the lab for hours. Tony didn’t seem to mind and even looked excited while explaining things.

“You sure this isn’t a problem?” asked Bucky one night while trying to get together some engine Tony took apart and explained just minutes before. Bucky had woken up from a nightmare once again and JARVIS had informed him Tony was still in the lab. Bucky hated the thought that Tony had to make things at night because he consumed too much of his time during the day.

“Nah, it’s okay,” shrugged Tony. “I was just playing with Tasha’s wristshots. I would tell you to not tell her but she probably knows anyway. Swear to god she knows about this tower more than me. More than JARVIS even.”

“No. I mean yes, she probably does, but that’s not what I meant.” With a proud smile he gave Tony his engine back. His hands no longer shook and he was calm once more. Tony always could calm him down. “Don’t you need to sleep?”

“I slept for a while after you left for dinner,” waved him Tony of.

“Wait, so you haven’t had dinner yet?”

They ended up on the couch in the living room with leftovers from last three days and some weird movie about high school basketball player who wants to sing to win over some girl. Tony fell asleep on his shoulder during the first movie and didn’t move from there. Bucky couldn’t fall asleep again, so he let JARVIS play the rest of the movies.

When Steve came over after his morning run, he took one look at them and smirked at Bucky. The soldier just rolled his eyes, but when Steve smiled at him he smiled back. Steve just patted his shoulder on his way to the kitchen where he started making breakfast.

Clint came to the room as soon as the smell from the kitchen. He took one look at the TV where the third movie was ending and then almost fell over laughing. Tony moved then and murmured something about the musical being a classic before opening his eyes and smiling softly at Bucky.

“Hey,” he almost whispered just inches from Bucky’s face. Before Bucky could react Tony was on his feet arguing with Clint about heteronormativity in movies for teenagers… or something. Bucky didn’t know what to do.

Then Thor came in shouting about poptarts and Bucky started to feel crowded. However before he could run there was a warm body pressing into his side. Tony wasn’t even looking at him, was still fighting with Clint. But Bucky calmed down immediately.

That breakfast was his first meal with the entire team. He was sandwiched between Tony and Steve who were the only ones trying to get to his personal space. Clint and Natasha were discussing weapons and once in a while wanted his opinion. He was careful in the beginning, but Steve nodded and Tony smiled at him every time he participated in the conversation. Soon he was actually enjoying the discussion.

***

After that he started to come out more.

Clint and Natasha were great to talk to about weapons. Tony was the best in making them but talking with someone who knew how to shoot and which weapon was the best for which job was entirely different.

Steve and Thor were great about discussing the pop culture and new customs. Tony was the best to actually watch the movies and listen to the music with but these two guys were great for comparing notes.

Steve also started to drag him out. First just for a walk (which then turned into their morning run with Sam), to see Brooklyn and some places they never visited back then. But after a while they also started going to museums and galleries. Just places where there weren’t that many people. This new world was wonderful and Steve was determinate to explore it all with his best friend. Bucky was okay with it as long as he could go to Tony’s lab after their little adventures and spend some time complaining and lots of time just hiding from the wonderful world. Tony didn’t mind.

And Bruce… well, Bruce was more Tony’s friend than anyone’s else. Bruse was isolating himself from the rest of the Avengers almost as much as Bucky was, but Tony often laughed or at least smiled when he was with him. And that was good. Bruce also offered to make Bucky some of his herbal tea when he met him at 2 AM in the communal kitchen so Bucky decided he liked him, too. Even though he wasn’t sure how to spend time with him.

And then there was Tony.

Bucky knew Tony was special even before coming to the tower. Not only was his face on majority of celebrity and business magazines, but Steve had talked about him twice the time he’d talked about the rest of the Avengers when he had tried to make him prepared for the Avengers. He’d talked about his past partying and his flashy personality. He’d talked about his alcoholism and bratty attitude. And then he had told him Tony was the bravest man he’s ever met with the biggest heart he’s ever seen.

And Tony was all of that and more.

Once Bucky came to the lab while Tony was in the middle of a bottle of whiskey. First he seemed ashamed, but then his face scrounged in anger. He threw the bottle in Bucky’s direction, shouted something about him and fucking himself and then stormed off. The next day he refused to look Bucky in the eyes while pretending nothing happened. It took almost the whole afternoon to make him actually look at Bucky so he could tell him it was okay.

It was the day Bucky realized he’s not the only one with issues.

As Bucky was recovering more and more from his personality came back. At least that’s what Steve was saying. Bucky was just feeling more and more comfortable around the Avengers so he let himself say what he was thinking. At least in the tower, surrounded by people he knew and was slowly coming to trust completely. Out of the tower was a different matter, but Sam told them it was okay, it was normal (healthy even) to take it slow and every step in the recovery was a win.

So he let himself talk freely. And then came the flirting. Oh, the flirting.

Tony was full of sexual innuendos, jokes, and puns and Bucky loved it. At first he only smiled in an answer (which Tony couldn’t see because he really made all of those all the time while working), but it was the first situation where he let himself talk freely.

The first time it happened Tony stopped and just stared at Bucky for a while. Bucky just started to think about apologizing when Tony grinned happily at him.

“Well, my friend, we’re gonna have so much fun with the dirty mind of yours.”

And they did.

Everyone was used to Tony’s rambling which sometimes turned to mindless flirting. Nobody paid any attention to it anymore. But the first time Bucky answered in front of the others?”

“Holy shit, Cap. Stark is corrupting your buddy.”

Steve snorted at that.

“The day Buck needs corrupting is the day Doom invites us all for an afternoon tea with cookies.”

Bucky just grinned at Steve who looked more proud than anything else at the moment. Bucky still didn’t remember much from before the war but lately Steve had felt more and more like a friend to Bucky. He knew he could count on him with everything and that was a good thing.

***

One day Bucky made sure Tony’s favorite food was in the take out they had for dinner, because he hadn’t seen him in the last twenty hours and was almost sure Tony hadn’t eaten for the whole time.

So he took Tony’s and his meal and went to the lab.

He was surprised to see the lab was dark and far too silent, but Tony sat at the table and his code was still working, so he went in.

“It was Clint’s turn to make dinner, so we have Chinese take out,” declared Bucky on his way to Tony. Tony didn’t flinch in surprise, which was a good thing, but he also didn’t say a word. He just silently closed the tabs in front of him and turned his attention to Bucky. Bucky gulped. Tony was dead serious and Bucky was suddenly nervous. He settled the take outs on the table before facing Tony. Then he just waited.

“Okay, so I wasn’t gonna say anything, but I just got the shovel talk from Cap, so… what are we, Buck?” His posture was still and he obviously tried to control his face. And he would probably fool most people, but Bucky spent the last months watching Tony. He saw the uncertainty in Tony’s eyes and corners of his mouth. “There’s the flirting, obviously, but does it actually mean something? Does it lead somewhere? It’s cool, if it doesn’t, really. It can be only friendly flirting or whatever, I really don’t-”

“Yes,” interrupted him Bucky sharply. Tony stopped speaking and just blinked at Bucky. It wasn’t just uncertainty in his eyes anymore. There was also embarrassment and slight anxiety. Bucky hated it. “Yes, I… I hope it leads somewhere. Not yet,” he added hurriedly, not wanting to give Tony any hope he wasn’t ready to fulfill. “I’m not… in a good place right now. It’s better, just… Sometimes I still don’t recognize myself in the mirror. I remember most of Winter Soldier and some of war Bucky, but almost nothing from pre-war Bucky. I still don’t know who I really am and I need to find this out first.”

“But I’m part of the plan, right?”

“Definitely,” smiled Bucky softly. “Spending time with you helps. A lot. But I’m not in a place where dating seems like a good idea yet.”

“But when you will be…”

“You’ll be the first one to know.”

Tony sat there for a little while longer before grinning widely and clapping his hands.

“Great, glad to have this over. Is it food? Please tell me Clint wasn’t feeling like experimenting again. The last Chinese he called for was so terrible even four burgers didn’t help with the terrible taste it left in my mouth.”

***

Sam said he was recovering very quickly, but it didn’t feel like it. Bucky was in the tower for almost half a year and he still got nightmares and night terrors. At least the second ones were very irregular now and mostly came about once in two weeks.

During the day he was mostly okay. He knew most of his triggers now so he was avoiding them as well as he could. He didn’t have an episode in weeks now.

But then there were some days where he just regressed. He woke up feeling down, not wanting to get up or talk to people. On these days he was mostly thinking about actually dying when he’d fell of the train. The world would certainly be better without him in the last seventy years.

One of these days happened about a week after his talk with Tony.

He didn’t know how long he’d been lying in his bed when the door to his room opened and Steve walked in. One look was enough for him to figure out what was going on.

“You want me to go get Tony?” Bucky silently shook his head. He didn’t want Tony to see him like that. Steve sighed but sat down next to Bucky’s bed. “He was the one who noticed you were missing, you know? He came from his lab after you didn’t bother him about breakfast. Was asking about you.” Bucky didn’t answer. He still didn’t want to talk. “I told him he could come here himself, but he didn’t want to cross your boundaries. Well, he’s Tony so he didn’t say it in so many words, but he worries about you, Buck.” It was silent for a while, before Steve softly added. “He’s good for you. And you’re good for him.”

Bucky lied still for a while, thinking about Tony. The truth was that if Bucky had died seventy years ago he would never meet the genius. And if he’d never meet him, there would have been no one to bring food to Tony and trick him to sleep by needing a pop culture reference answered.

With that in mind he got up and headed to the lab. He knew Steve wouldn’t mind. He got that Bucky didn’t want to talk.

When he arrived to the lab, Tony was trying to help his robots clean the lab. The robots thought he was playing with them, so whatever Tony cleaned they made a mess of again. Tony was voicing his frustration to them, but there was no heat in his words. And Bucky knew if he really was that frustrated he could easily turn them off.

He still didn’t feel like talking, so he just silently went to Tony. He was standing there for a while, waiting for Tony to finish, when Tony turned around and jumped a little.

“For god’s sake, you’re like a ghost! Jay! Why don’t I know a deadly assassin is in my lab?”

“Sorry, sir, but you set me to silent mode forty minutes ago.”

Tony rolled his eyes at his AI.

“This I’ve got for creating you. Bucky-bear! So you’re alive.” There was a relief in Tony’s smile.

Bucky didn’t answer. He just did one final step to Tony’s personal space before hugging him as close to him as he could.

“Wow, okay, that’s… unexpected.”

It really was. Bucky hadn’t flinch from touch in weeks and he was even initiating some contact with Tony, but never that much. It was mostly a hand on the shoulder or thighs pressed together. That was it.

Tony let himself be hugged and even hugged Bucky back. Bucky tucked his face to Tony’s hair, closed his eyes and held tight.

“Hey, big guy,” said Tony right to his ear. “Want to move this to the couch? We can cuddle here and we can even watch some lame chickflick. JARVIS, you know from which file to pick. Also – a lockdown, please.”

Bucky realized a few minutes later that this was much better way to spend these days. He was wrapped in some blanket Tony kept there, was lying on the couch with his head in Tony’s lap and Tony’s fingers in his hair while some movie played on the TV and Tony kept running his commentary on the movie. The only thoughts in his head now were about Tony and how warm and soft he was.

They were in the middle of a second movie when Tony’s stomach grumbled. Bucky looked up to his face which was a little bit pink.

“You okay with Steve bringing food here? I might forget about breakfast.”

Bucky rolled his eyes fondly. Then he sat up.

“Let’s go to the kitchen. It’s Steve’s turn to feed us so I’m sure there is plenty of healthy food for both of us.”

When he was on his feet and Tony still sat on the couch, Bucky stopped and looked back. Tony was surprised which wasn’t a usual expression.

“You sure? Not that I’m complaining, just… when you disappear like you did today you’re usually out for at least a day.”

Bucky was just staring at him for a while (did Tony notice every time it happened before? Was he concerned?) before shrugging.

“I’m sure. I’m better now.” He hesitated before adding: “You make me better.”

Tony gave him a soft smile. The one he’d seen only few times before – mostly when Tony was sleepy and definitely only when the two of them were alone.

“Awesome. Come on, soldier, I’m sure you’re half starved. JARVIS?”

“Sir.”

“Bucky’s code now overruns all the settings of the lab.”

“Yes, sir.”

Bucky was left speechless once again. He had never been denied an access to the lab, but it also never had been on a lockdown. He was aware what it meant. He now had unlimited access to the lab no matter what.

***

The progress in their relationship was slow, but they didn’t mind. They spent a lot of time alone in Tony’s lab. Sometimes they still tinkered with Tony’s tech and sometimes Bucky just watched Tony work (his favorite moments were when Tony forgot he was there and started talking to his projects and snickering with JARVIS), but mostly they cuddled on the couch catching Bucky up with movies or just talking.

The first time Tony had to go to business trip Bucky wasn’t sure what to do with himself. Steve called it moping so Bucky kicked his ass in their regular sparring match.

Tony was back a day sooner than he promised, but it didn’t make it any easier the second time he had to go. Which was too soon – only two weeks after he came back.

“You can come with me, you know,” said Tony when Bucky started complaining the second time in three hours. “Milano is really nice this time of the year. And it’s not like you need another ticket to my plane.”

All Bucky’s papers including his passport were sorted as soon as Tony could get his hands to it, so it really wouldn’t be a problem.

Bucky murmured something about not going back to Europe and stopped complaining. The truth was he wasn’t ready for as many people as they would meet during the travel. Steve still dragged him around New York but he was still choosing places with as little people as possible. And it always took only a few hours. He definitely wasn’t ready for Milano.

He started to reconsider his decision when Tony didn’t call or text for twenty hours. He called when he landed and then even before going to bed, but since then…

It took another three hours for Pepper to call, saying she’d just got a call demanding money in exchange for the genius.

The moment Steve informed them about the call, everyone’s faces turned into stone. Natasha and Clint had their phones in their hands in a minute calling their Italian contacts and Thor was halfway to roof to speak with Heimdall. Bucky didn’t wait for Steve to face him, he went right to the elevator.

“JARVIS, have we got anything?”

“Sir’s suit was left in his room and his phone was turned off sixteen hours ago 50 miles away from Milano.”

“50 miles which way?”

“North.”

“Abandoned bunkers in Alps in my phone in twenty minutes. First the ones in Italy, then France, Switzerland and then Germany. I will also need a ticket to Milano. I don’t care how long or where I’ll have to wait – I want to be there as soon as possible. And I’ll need a taxi in half an hour.”

By the time he was done he was already in his room.”

“Very well, sir. Anything else?”

Bucky stopped all his movement when he found his Winter Soldier clothes.

“Do I have access to the weaponry?”

“Your codes has been given access to the whole tower. Only Sir has as much access as you do.”

The only things Bucky needed with him were his old clothes, his phone, some weapons and a credit card Tony had given him months before.

***

The first four bunkers were as abandoned as official papers stated.

It was another thirty hours after Steve’s announcement. Bucky had flown out just two hours after that with interceptions in London and Münich. He had slept through the most of it and hadn’t slept since.

Now he was on his way back to a lent car when a jet landed a few steps ahead of him. It wasn’t even properly landed when Captain America jumped out and went right to Bucky.

“Buck! What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Looking for Tony.”

Steve stopped a few steps in front of him. Bucky knew it was for his looks. He had his full Winter Soldier uniform on with the goggles in his hair and the mask in his right hand. He was also staring intently at Steve. If he thought he could just grab Bucky and stash him somewhere safe he was in for a surprise.

But Steve’s face just softened.

“So are we. We only spotted you because thirty miles from here was an explosion in an abandoned bunker. I’ll bet whatever you want that’s where they’re keeping him. You coming?”

Even before Steve finished Bucky was already on his way to the jet.

The minute both of them were on board they took off. Natasha was behind the wheel with Clint right next to her. Thor probably was on his own way here and even Sam was checking his wings. But someone was still missing.

“Bruce left the room right after you. He’s still in his… room.”

Which meant he had hulked out and was now in his containment unit. Bruce didn’t mind calling it that, but Steve hated the name.

He nodded before taking out his gun and checking it. The kidnappers won’t know what hit them.

Steve opened his mouth as if to say something but then just shook his head.

They arrived to the bunker in something under twenty minutes. Before Steve could say anything Bucky was out of the jet. He wasn’t patient enough for Steve’s strategies in the moment.

There weren’t many people guarding the entrance and all of them got bullet between their eyes before they could notice him.

In the hallway there were another three people. He easily killed two of them before pushing the third one against the wall while throwing his gun away.

“Where is he?” he snarled to the guy’s face. The guy was young and terrified.

“Aren’t you so-called superheroes supposed to save lives, not end them?”

“I’m not a hero.” With that Bucky broke two fingers on the guy’s right hand. “I won’t ask again. Where. Is. He.”

The guy gulped before looking to his left. Bucky looked the same way. The hall was divided there to two ways.

Bucky broke another finger on the same hand.

“He’s probably not even alive. The explosion blocked the way further and the system that kept the oxygen coming.”

Bucky broke his middle finger on the left hand.

“To the right! It’s the right way.”

By that time the rest of the Avengers caught up. They didn’t even slowed, just went right to the right. Bucky let the guy go and went right after them. It took them half an hour to get through the ruins and that was only because he, Steve and Thor were able to lift much heavier pieces than any other man.

Tony was sitting three steps behind the ruins. All around him were dead or unconscious men and he was holding a stone. His suit was torn and his eye was black and his lip was split. He was white and he had dust everywhere.

He was the most beautiful thing Bucky had ever seen

Before anyone else could do anything Bucky jumped to him and hugged him tight. Tony let go of the stone and hugged him right back.

“You’re never going anywhere without me again,” Bucky murmured to his mask.

“I told you to go with me,” replied Tony, his voice hoarse. Bucky laughed while burying his nose to Tony’s hair. It was dirty and smelled but it was Tony.

When they finally pulled apart it was only just long enough for Bucky to take off his mask. Right after he brought Tony back as close to him as he could while kissing him. It was hard, fast, dirty and exactly what they needed to assure themselves they were really there and alive.

“Ugh, guys, do you really have to do this here, in front of everyone? I mean – congrats on finally figuring it out, but come on!”

Tony smiled to the kiss and that made Bucky smile, too.

“Does anyone else feel like watching their parents make out?”

“Shut up, Clint.”

***

Tony ended up with a bruised rib, three day bed rest and a promise from Pepper to not send him to another business trip for at least a month.

Oh, and an official, honest-to-god boyfriend.

Bucky ended up with an official status as an Avenger and a very bad patient.

Tony wasn’t able to stay in bed for thirty minutes if he didn’t have anything to do. But that was okay because Bucky was free most of the time so he spent that time with Tony in his bed.

He wasn’t hiding in his and Steve’s flat anymore. He hadn’t had any night terrors in weeks and nightmares only sometimes. Mostly in his own bed. He hadn’t had any episode even longer and his silent days were few and far between. And Tony handled all of them.

It wasn’t perfect. They both had their issues, their bad days. But they were good.

Life was good.

**Author's Note:**

> I fell in love with this pairing and I really hope there are gonna be more fics and more authors around soon. (Yeah, I run out of things to read.)  
> Anyway - hope you liked it =o)


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